Tuesday, June 22, 2010

How Exactly?

A question I've been asking myself these few days. How exactly was I supposed to be supportive of you. First, I called you to inform you of what I've done and hoping you would help me find a solution. But what do I get, an "eff you" and the next day you won't even look at me. Fine I thought to myself. This is normal for us. But you usually will eventually come to me regardless of who's fault it was. But not this time. It seemed like you don't care anymore and that I should have realize this and just stay away from you. Plus, you saying that you don't have anything to do with me anymore.
Every now and then, I just can't effing take my mind of you. Try to have fun but it don't work. Try to talk about something else but I just don't know why I have to bring you up. Still worrying bout every little thing you do, how you are with him now. Seeing that like you've completely got me out of your mind, I'm just too attached to you. Why I just don't know why. Maybe because you did say things that insisted me so much that you would not hurt me even though you did mention it in beginning. I believed, and still am..hoping to believe again. But clearly that's just an empty hope. What do I care.
I just can't show my support for someone who made me feel that I'm not allowed in their life anymore. I've had your back all this time and I didn't stop yet no matter how much it hurts. Because I believe that theirs something in return for my effort. Maybe not just yet. Well, it is a may be...

Maybe there is, or maybe I'm just delusional..

I did everything I could just to see you smile because of how much I know you suffer deep inside..

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